Confessions of a Sex Starved Relationship Expert

Confessions of a Sex Starved Relationship Expert

Sex Starved! I am blessed with a pretty woman as a wife. She’s got the face of an angel and the perfect body for me but the truth must be told, I have been sex starved.

When I met her, I dreamt of the day I would ‘devour’ her. I dreamt of touching, kissing, and holding. As our wedding day drew near, the intensity of my dreams rose astronomically but after we got married, I was sex starved.

My plan was to have sex in the morning, afternoon, evening, midnight and even have it as early morning fruit salad but alas, I was sex starved.

Wife: “Oya na, let’s do another one”.

Expert: “Another Wetin? Finest, manage that one for now. You wan kill the boy?”

Wife: “Hehe! I thought you wanted it morning, afternoon and evening?”

Expert: “That was then; when I had no idea that the path of a married man is not that he has sex morning, afternoon and night”

Wife: “Hehehe! My husband ooo”

(Take note, this conversation may never happen but it provides insights into many marriages and relationships)

Personal Story: We had just gotten married and barely two weeks after she was off to Plateau State for Youth Service. “Why I come marry if I no go do something?”. I even fell sick on this matter (don’t ask for details).

Many moments I want it but can’t have it! It’s either because she has a visitor, I have fasting (abeg, is it compulsory to abstain during this period? – don’t ask me. If you do, who will I ask?), she’s sick, she’s not up to it, she just wants to cuddle and many others I wouldn’t want to spill (in order not to scare single people from getting married. Come on, I’m kidding).

Wondering what all these rants above are all about?

Singles Think of Sex When They think of Relationship or Marriage

One of the core reasons why singles want a partner is Sex. When a single person sees married people, all he or she can envision is their sex life. They think this way because sex is actually the reason why most people get married. Take away sex from the equation, what many people call chemistry will turn to physics and they will remain single-ever-after instead of happily married ever after.

Sex is Not What Makes Marriages Last

There is a need to echo it into this generation that as much as we have sexualized everything and all we think about is sex when the issue of love comes up, it’s not the answer. Sex doesn’t make marriages last. You can have great sex but have a shitty relationship. Many can boast that the sex is good but their partner is the devil’s incarnate.

So, as singles, while you go around testing the cookie, never make a lifelong and life-altering decision of marriage based on good sex. Sex is cheap and everywhere but a partner who will make you happy cannot be found anywhere.

You Will Be Sex Starved

This is to officially prepare you whether you are a man or woman that the moment you get married, you will also get starved sexually because your partner is not a sex machine who will be ready to give it to you every single time you ask for it. A woman will get pregnant and may not have any desire for sex. A man may suffer low energy due to stress that makes him wonder if his manhood is still functioning.

Get prepared and embrace self-discipline now that you are still single. Sex is an appetite that needs to first get cured as a single. is a criminal that seeks to jail you but you need to imprison it first as a single. Sex is a need that your partner cannot meet ALL of the time.

First published on Bellanaija.com

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