6 Dating Tips Every Introvert Needs To Know

An introvert is a person who feels more comfortable focusing on their inner thoughts and ideas. They prefer to spend time with one or two people rather than with a crowd. They usually like to keep to themselves. Sometimes, even if they have something relevant to say, they will still keep it in. Being an Introvert is not about being shy, it’s about how to gain and expend energy and energy is one of the things people look out for on the first date.

I know going on dates can be nerve-racking but have you ever tried to go on a date with an introvert? Let’s take it the other way round, are you an introvert and it’s so hard for you to go on a date? I understand how it can be because sometimes it’s difficult to hang out with friends. You end up making excuses and you find yourself in that room of yours. Hey! You have to step out and I’ll be right by your side to lead you through. 

Here are some tips you’ll need to have a successful date as an introverted person. You won’t bore your partner, you’ll be awesome!

1. Pick a place you are already comfortable at: You don’t have to stress it by picking a place you are not familiar with. Even if it’s that coffee shop you visit every day.

You have a personality where you usually like to keep to yourself so going to a place you are comfortable with might bring you out a little. You can even start conversations about your experience there and kick things off.

Pay attention to how you feel in certain spaces so you can become more familiar with your own environmental triggers. For instance; You might have a special spot you like to sit in a restaurant, probably at the corner so you can scan your environment. You hate to sit in the middle cause you feel people are staring at you and it makes you uncomfortable.

2. Make it quiet: As an introvert, you might find crowds and people exhausting. Once you feel this way, you will not be able to interact properly with your date or make a good impression of yourself. Awareness of environmental factors can tell why we might be feeling or behaving a certain way. Introverts tend to thrive more in low-key environments.

If you want to go to the beach you can pick a private one or a beach where there will be few people. Most times, they can still stay in an energetic place with the crowd if they are with their friends but not someone they are meeting for the first time.

Since you are meeting the person for the first time, you can have a quiet one-on-one conversation. If the date goes well, there will be plenty of time to have dates in an energetic environment. For now, we’ll just stay chilled.

3. Use Grounding techniques: This is when you use your five senses, seeing, touching, hearing, smelling, and tasting to help you move through distress. This is important in a situation where you are already in a place you are not familiar with or a noisy/energetic environment with a lot of people. Here you just look for an object, it could be a cane chair, a glass door, the food you are eating, it could be anything. By focusing on it, you’ll clear space in your mind and be in the right position to talk to your date.

You might not even notice you have practised ground technique but if you have ever tried to play with your food with your cutlery or you just fixed your eyes on an object because you were nervous on a date, then you practised it and we hope it worked for you.

4. Ask the right questions; As an introvert, you tend to overthink and you start to become anxious. ‘was my joke funny? Is he enjoying my company?’ Breathe

You should know how to ask questions that won’t end with just yes or no. Ask questions that can start a conversation and gradually you’ll get comfortable. Remember, being an introvert doesn’t mean you are shy, it’s more about the energy and trust me, you can bring just that. You don’t have to rehearse because at some point you might forget a thing or two and you begin to panic.

Asking open-ended questions is also nice because you are loosening yourself up from that pressure and getting to know more about the person and it makes you more comfortable with them.

5. Be open to random conversations: I know it’s a bit tough but you can try. At some point, you won’t be the only one asking questions. Your date will bring up conversations too and you have to be able to interact. Don’t be quick to press your phone. No man is an island, you need people and you have to interact.

6. Take the pressure off yourself to be perfect: Sometimes, going on dates can feel like a performance. You just have to take it easy and be yourself. All of the topics listed above are for you to have a good time. If you try to push yourself to be extroverted then you are just giving the person a wrong picture of you.

I’m not saying you shouldn’t go out of your comfort zone, you should, but don’t force things. Be original and be you.

After a successful date, you might sometimes be exhausted. Give yourself time to charge up. Take a break.

I’m hoping these tips will be useful to you anytime!