Infidelity: When To Walk Away

When one is in an unhealthy relationship or one that has experienced infidelity; understanding when to walk away is very important.

Whenever one discovers that their partner is practicing infidelity; it can cause trauma and depression leaving one unsure of how to move on. This can cause one to make decisions that aren’t in their best interest and make choices that will lengthen their recovery time.

5 Ways To Know When To Escape Infidelity

Making sure that you look out for this following signs will help you know when it’s time to walk away from infidelity so you don’t end up wasting your time or experiencing trauma.

1. The cheater refuses to take responsibility.

Do they refuse to take responsibility for what they did? Do they tell you that it wasn’t a big deal, that it happened once, that the sex wasn’t very good, and that you should just get over it?

Does your partner, the one who cheated on you, blame you for what they did? Do they tell you that if you had only been nicer or had more sex with them or given them more freedom, they would never have cheated?

If a cheater isn’t willing to own up to the fact that they violated the boundaries of your relationship and they caused you pain, it’s definitely time to walk away.

Someone who isn’t willing to take ownership of the fact that they cheated is somebody who might very well cheat again. They don’t believe that they were at fault and, in future, they might see cheating as something that they can do again.

2. The cheater refuses to talk about what happened.

Now that you know about the affair, you have a lot of questions about what happened.

You probably want to know why it happened, how it happened, and all the details so that you can wrap your mind around all of it. Perhaps, you believe that if you only had more information, you could make sense of it all.

When you approach your partner to talk about the infidelity, do they shut you down? Do they refuse to talk about it and suggest that you act like it didn’t happen and move on?

Do they yell and scream when you try to ask questions, telling you that you are being stupid to even ask?

COMMUNICATION IS IMPORTANT

A key part of surviving infidelity is communication. It’s important that your person is honest with you and are willing to talk about what happened.

Don’t ask too many questions. Wanting clarity about what’s going on that brought you to this place but knowing too many details will ultimately be harmful.

3. The cheater isn’t willing to change.

A key part of surviving infidelity is recognizing the need for change in the relationship, and for things to be different going forward.

 It’s important to take a look at the relationship and what’s missing from it. It’s important to discuss how to do things differently moving forward. And, it’s important to define boundaries that you might need to process what has happened.

4. You can’t get over it emotionally

Since you learned your partner cheated, have you been really hard on yourself?

Are you blaming yourself for what happened? Do you feel like an idiot for missing the signs? Do you question everything about yourself — your body, your hair, etc.?

This happens after being cheated on. You feel less than in every way. Why would someone cheat on you? It can only be because you’re not good enough, correct?

If you stay in the relationship after the infidelity, you’ll never be able to strengthen your self-esteem. 

You’ll be reminded every day about what happened, and if you compromise your principles, you would sink deeper into a dark place, reliving what happened over and over again.

So, if you’re finding that your self-esteem is at rock bottom and not rebounding, then it might be time to walk away after infidelity. Your self-esteem is key to your happiness and if it stays in that dark place, you might never get it back.

5. Forgiveness is not an option.

Are you finding it impossible to forgive your partner for what happened and to move on?

If you can’t forgive your person for what they did, then it’s time to walk away. Staying will only cause you more pain and prevent you from finding happiness.

IN CONCLUSION

Even after knowing when to walk away from a relationship after infidelity, it’s still very hard to act on the decision. You may feel like you will never find happiness again or trust someone like your partner. Remember that time heals all and you’ll still have your happily ever after.