In the relationship world, everyone does not want the same things. Some date casually trying to see where the relationship is headed and others are in a relationship because they want it to end in marriage. Some others don’t plan on ever getting married.
Whatever your intentions are when you enter a relationship, you need to be honest about them to your partner particularly if they’re showing signs they want marriage and you do not intent to ever get married.
While dating, you get to see all aspects of the other person’s personality. One of the things you’ll notice is how eager your partner is for marriage. For people who are not ready to get married or make a long-term commitment, this eagerness may be a turnoff. For those who are looking for a lifelong mate, a high interest in marriage could be encouraging.
Whatever intentions you have, marriage is not something you should ever rush into. Always proceed with caution when the person you’re dating is pressuring you to get married before you’re ready.
Signs Your Partner Is Eager to Get Married
At times, you can tell when a partner is eager for marriage. Your future together is a constant conversation that they discuss openly and honestly. They start talking about dates and are direct about what they expect concerning marriage.
Some other times, you won’t see the signs and when you’re unable to connect these signs to one another, it could lead to heartbreak for both partners. Below a some signs that your partner wants marriage.. and soon!!
- Talks About Their Parents’ Long and Happy Marriage
When partners frequently bring up their parents’ happy marriage and mention how they were already married by this age, you might be dealing with someone who is overly eager to get married, or at the very least worried about the fact that they are not married yet.
When someone wants to get married sooner rather than later, they may constantly talk about all of the happily married couples they know and how they want that too. When these hints are dropped, it is best to have a straightforward conversation about your marriage goals.
- Frequently Visits Home Furnishing Stores
If you and your partner are not living together, but you frequently browse furniture and home decor stores, one of two things could be taking place. First, your partner may just really enjoy decorating and truly have no ulterior motives. Or, the furniture store trips could be a subtle way of getting you to think about making a home together, especially if your partner asks you which items you prefer.
When these trips happen a lot instead of doing other fun things together, this could be your partner’s way of hinting at marriage. Rather than making assumptions, ask your partner why they enjoy this type of shopping.
- Has Been Engaged Before
If your partner has been engaged at least once but has never made it to the altar, they may like the idea of marriage and engagement and just be afraid of commitment. Or your partner could have realized that the person they were engaged to was not a good fit.
If your partner has had a string of engagements, this is a warning sign. Either your partner has a habit of pressuring others to get married before they are ready, or your partner is not ready for marriage either. Ask about the previous engagements to determine what went wrong and why your partner never married.
- Encourages Unprotected Sex
When people are eager to get married, they may have no problem skipping birth control, especially if the relationship is committed and monogamous. But until a couple is married, it is not safe or wise to have unprotected sex. So if your partner is asking for unprotected sex, this is a warning sign.
For instance, your partner may welcome an unexpected pregnancy and see it as a doorway to marriage. If you are not ready for a baby or marriage, be sure to use contraception every time. Pregnancy requires discussion and should not be a spur-of-the-moment decision.
- Talks About Future Dreams and Wedding Plans
If your partner already knows where the wedding venue should be and what they plan to wear, then they are definitely looking to get married at some point and have given it a lot of thought. While it is normal for people to daydream about their future wedding, talking about it as if it is happening tomorrow is not.
It’s also a red flag if you feel like you are just a commodity to help your partner reach their marriage goal. When this happens, eager partners are often more interested in the idea of marriage than they are interested in you.
- Introduces You to Their Family Early in the Relationship
Some of us have been there before and being introduced to an entire family early in a relationship is often awkward and uncomfortable. This type of pressure is not needed when you have just started dating. After all, you are still getting to know one another and have no idea where your relationship is headed. Getting family members involved makes it difficult for you to relax and take things slow.
If you express your reluctance to meet the parents and your partner gets upset, this may be a red flag that your partner wants things to move quickly. It’s best to have an honest conversation about your goals and your expectations.
Handling Your Partner’s Eagerness For Marriage
If the person you are dating exhibits any of the above signs, it’s likely that they want to get married quickly. However, marriage is not something you want to rush into no matter how much you might like the other person. Your partner should be just as discriminant as you are about making a lifelong commitment.
Taking your time when you first meet someone is important. The dating relationship is the perfect time to learn all you can about someone. If you suspect your partner is eager to get married, be upfront about your goals to avoid too many hurt feelings or accusations down the road.
- Ask About Your Partner’s Future Goals
The best way to determine your partner’s intentions is to ask. While the above signs can provide clues, they are not definitive explanations for your partner’s behaviors and motives. Healthy communication is one of the most important elements of a successful relationship. So start things off right by asking your partner about expectations, thoughts, and goals.
- Be Honest About What You Want
When your partner talks, it is important that you not only listen and try to understand, but that you also are open and honest. If you are only interested in casually dating your partner, you need to be upfront about that, especially if your partner wants to get married someday.
It is unfair to tie someone to a relationship with you if you have no desire to ever get married. You will be much happier in a relationship with someone with similar goals, and so will your partner.
- Agree to a Timeline
If you know your partner wants to eventually get married, but you only want a casual relationship right now, you need to let your partner know. If your partner is willing to wait on you, you could agree to a timeline.
For instance, you could agree to date for six months and then talk about where you see the relationship going. If at that time you are still unsure of what you want, while your partner is ready for the next step, you may decide that it is time for you both to move on.
- Set Appropriate Boundaries
If your partner is relentless about the idea of marriage or is pressuring you into things you are not comfortable with, like unprotected sex or meeting the entire extended family, then you need to set some boundaries. For instance, ask that marriage discussions be delayed for at least three to six months. Or, tell your partner that unprotected sex is not an option for you.
If your partner will not respect these boundaries, even though you have asked that they be put in place, this is a red flag. Obviously, your partner is unable to respect your wishes. If your partner is disregarding or dismissing your wishes early in a relationship, it will only get worse as the relationship progresses.
IN CONCLUSION
When a couple is open and honest about their marriage goals, misunderstandings are unlikely and there will be no accusations if the relationship ends. Ensure you and your partner discuss your expectations early on. Your relationship will be less stressful and more enjoyable if you do this. Love and light, Wonder.
