RELATIONSHIP
Unhealthy Compromises You Should Not Be Keeping
Published
2 years agoon
Compromises are good for any relationship, but unhealthy compromises can make things even worse.
I know you want your relationship to work. You want it to last. But…there should always be a limit to how far you’re willing to take things.
Everyone desires to have a healthy growing relationship.
One important way to achieve that is through consistent compromise.
Sometimes though, compromises can turn to unhealthy compromises if you do not compromise for the right things.
Some things, you just can’t compromise on, while some you defintely have to.
What are the lines you should never cross when compromising in a relationship? Let’s explore them;
Your Boundaries
Every relationship should have some set boundaries for both parties involved. What are things that you’re willing to allow and things that you know that you will never be comfortable or allow.
There are some boundaries that you can adjust a bit for, some others especially ones that involves your life and personals values should never be changed for a person or a situation.
Always make this crystal clear in your relationship before you begin one and even while still in one. They need to understand that as much as you love them and you’re willing to make things work, there are some set boundaries that you will be wholeheartedly sticking to. This would completely avoid unhealthy compromises.
Your self-respect
There is no love or healthy relationship without self respect. If you do not understand how respect works, not just for yourself but also for your partner in the relationship, then it would be difficult to reach a clean compromise.
What makes a good compromise is one done willingly, without bias or esteem issues. You should want to compromise because you want to. Not because you respect your partners wishes much more than yours.
Your self respect should matter to you too. Stand by your decision and be unwilling to live in a situation that is completely disrespectful to you.
A person who shows you disrespect on a consistent basis, will want you to compromise for them consistently even when it makes you uncomfortable. Don’t do it. A relationship should be filled with respect, it shouldn’t be a one sided affair. It should be a mutual respect from both parties.
Your friendships
You should never ever compromise to a point where you have to let go of your friends because of your partner. That is not compromising, that is manipulation.
Your partner should be accepting of everyone close to you and if they don’t feel comfortable around some people, they should be able to communicate that to you without giving you an ultimatum of a compromise.
Your partner should get used to some spaces in your life especially ones as permanent as great friendship with people.
4. Dreams
Never compromise on your dreams. Remember your dreams, no matter how wild or far fetched they might seem, are very valid.
Do not give up on your dreams and goals in Life because you want to reach a “compromise” with your partner.
It is a decision that will only make you harbor resentment in the long run and you will probably have regrets later on.
5. Your family
This one should be extremely obvious. Family is a NO compromise area. That’s your turf. You should never feel pressured to give up your family for your partner. Anyone who tells you compromise you’re family in a relationship, is definitely some one you should not be with.