The 10 Steps You Must Take to Get Your Relationship to the Altar Part 2
We continue from the first part. If you haven’t read that, do that here – https://lovelife.ng/coach-legend-10-steps-you-must-take-to-get-your-relationship-to-the-altar-part-1/
-
Focus on YOU
This is where I contradict a lot of my colleagues who preach that once you commit to a person, you must give all of your life to them. That is not what I recommend.
I recommend that you FOCUS on you! Most lovers are fixated on their partners. They are constantly calling and visiting; they are regularly asking, ‘how are you’, ‘where are you’, ‘have you slept?’, ‘have you pooed?’. They are choking their partners without knowing.
Come on, can you please focus on your dreams, goals, aspirations, purpose, assignment and your personal development such that your partner sees the asset you are becoming and says to himself “if I lose this one, I have lost a big meat”.
Now, this is not to say don’t care for your partner. You should. As a matter of fact, You Must! But everyday, let your gaze be more on your journey to awesomeness than on your monitoring of your partner – Get secured.
This is also about you saying ‘if this relationship will end up on the altar, it is upto me and no one else’. Saying this puts you in the drivers position; the place where you do the things you need to do instead of waiting for fate to happen.
-
Gain Communication Mastery
Starting a relationship is easy but staying in it is the big deal. As important as blood is to a woman, so is communication mastery to a relationship.
Talking is not communication. This is the mistake many people make before getting their fingers burnt in relationships. Unfortunately, most people fail to learn, they repeat the same mistake in multiple relationships and they continue to get heartbroken multiple times.
A man and a woman are different in their communication. Each man is even different from the other man. When you get to this process, you need to carefully study your partner as though you are studying for Cambridge exam. Note down every possible time your communication has been superb. Own it and duplicate it throughout your relationship – you will be shocked at the magic.
Gaining communication mastery is also building true friendship. Until this is done, the altar may be elusive.
-
Serve
The moment you get to this level, you are making a commitment to give your all to ensure the success and greatness of another.
Self-centeredness is not allowed if you intend for your relationship to get to the altar.
Whether you are a man or woman if you are not ready to become a servant and treat the person as a master, you are not ready for the altar.
To serve is to be there for a person like no one else would.
-
You Need a Love Goal
Have you ever heard someone say “I don’t even know why, I just keep loving her by the day?” What happened is simple, the person is speaking their love language consciously or unconsciously.
If you love salad, each time salad is presented to you, you like the person that offers it to you. That’s how love language is; everyone has some set of things that makes them feel loved extremely. For some people, it can be easily noted but for some, you need to dig deep to find it.
Love Goals is that thing (after carefully observing your partner) you have decided to do daily, weekly, monthly and yearly to keep your partner consistently in love with you. When you are able to do this, the altar is sure.
-
Get Coaching/Counselling
Most people take this for granted, no wonder their relationships never end up on the altar.
I have been there. I was having trouble in my relationship and was contemplating break-up. It took just one meeting with my counsellor for me to realise I was just experiencing what I call a ‘Normalcy Syndrome’.
You will have moments of tiredness and fatigue in your relationship. There will be a time you will be so fascinated by another woman or man and you will contemplate break-up. Sometimes, the other person wouldn’t even excite you as much – these are the moments where you need a dose of coaching and counselling.
I usually advise that you start with a coach or counsellor and you continue with one. That way you can enter wisely and continue wisely.
What you have just read is a Gabriel Olatunji-Legend thought and idea as a practicing online relationship coach and counselor. To get notifications about more of his free life changing teachings, subscribe below.