This article is not only for those in relationships. This is for everyone because everyone worries from time to time. Whether it is over the bills, over food, over life and over the things that we can’t even control, we are very prone to worrying. My aim first and foremost before relationships is that you love yourself and to do that, you need to stop worrying. Below are 6 tips to help you stop worrying and live your best life.
Stop getting ahead of yourself.
If you live as if the future has already happened you are having an emotional reaction (worry) to something that hasn’t happened yet. Practice staying in the moment by trying this:
Focus on an object in the room with you. Notice it in a way you never have before. What color is it? What shape is it? Is it possibly more beautiful than you realized? Breathe slowly.
Put your hand over your heart.
If you are worried, stressed or fearful, it’s likely your fight or flight system is activated and your cortisol levels are elevated. Oxytocin is an antidote to the stress hormone, cortisol. Many people can release it themselves.
Place your hand over your heart, close your eyes and imagine someone you feel completely safe with. A beloved pet will work too. As you remember feeling loved, sit with this feeling for at least 30 seconds. Notice the calm.
Practice self-acceptance.
Because worry can orbit around an unsure sense of self, it’s important to try shifting your self concept from negative to positive.
Decide on an affirmation for yourself (ex: I am lovable, I will be ok, etc). Every day, either say this affirmation aloud or in your head to help integrate this belief into your heart and mind.
Re frame your worry.
Remember that your perception drives your worry. You are the only one who can assign meaning to things. So if you assign worry to a lot of things try to practice reframing it to something more productive.
Consider something you often worry about. Is there another way you can see this situation? For example, if you fear you will not do well on an upcoming exam, what is truly the worst thing that can happen? Is it as “life or death” as your physiological reaction is telling you?
Find a trusted ear
A friend can be called upon to help clarify your thinking. Get someone on your team, explain what you’re working on and how they can help. When you find yourself worrying, call on them to help you process.
Identify what keeps you stuck – and work on it.
If you’ve tried the above suggestions and are not finding relief, a therapist can help you get unstuck. There may be prior experiences in your family of origin that explains why it’s more challenging for you.
In conclusion, I’d like to encourage with the awareness that worry and fear are very normal emotions but should not be allowed to overwhelm you. As you try the six tips, I’m sure you’ll overcome and stop worrying either about your relationship and life in general. Love and light, Wonder.
