Do You Find Your Partner’s Family Difficult? Here’s How To Handle It

In a relationship, communication is the most important thing. However, there are some topics that are difficult if not impossible to discuss with your partner and the topic of their family is one of them.

No matter how well your relationship is with your partner or how good your connection is together, family is a very tricky area to discuss.

Having problems with your in-laws is one of the oldest is something that many partners have gone through since the beginning of time and are still going through.

Asides from the person who’s having the difficulties with the family, the one who is a part of the difficult family could also be aware that their family is difficult, unreasonable, or just a bit confusing, however, it’s totally natural to get defensive and overprotective of them, which is why it can be really hard to talk about.

A difficult family can be a very big problem in a relationship. Once the problem comes up, figuring out what to do next can be challenging. Sometimes it can be best just to leave it alone. If you don’t love your partner’s family, but you only see them a few times a year and it’s slightly awkward, there’s no real reason to argue or make your partner feel uncomfortable. But if their family is really difficult or toxic, and you feel like it’s having an impact on you, your partner, or your relationship, then you may need to say something. These are the tips to consider when addressing the topic of your partner’s family with them.

Choose Your Words Carefully

When talking to your partner about their family, be sure to be considerate about the language you use. You don’t need to go on the attack or use words like “ridiculous,” “crazy,” or “nasty.” Instead, make sure to focus on the interactions you’ve had, things you’ve noticed, and how it makes you feel. Talking about how you’ve been affected, rather than listing things they’ve done wrong, will keep you from sounding like you’re in attack mode and will help create a foundation for a more constructive conversation.

Spell Things Out

Although you want to be careful how you choose your words, you also can’t beat around the bush. You may hope that dropping a few hints will make them aware of the problem but that might not work out.

It’s very important to address these issues directly. If you feel like your partner’s family is treating you poorly or causing trouble in your relationship, you should have some clear examples and let your partner know immediately. If they are there in the moment, bring it up when you are alone.

There’s a good chance that your partner is going to be resistant to hearing or seeing things that are wrong with their family, even if it’s incredibly obvious to you. You will need to use concrete examples and explain why it’s not right. (focusing on language about how it makes you feel).

If it’s made clear to them, the next step is to let them know that some of the behavior is not acceptable. The family members need to know that you are an important person in their life and that they need to be polite and respectful. Of course, you need to make sure that your actions are acceptable also and accept criticism if you’ve been behaving less than appropriately but it’s important to get it all out there without merely giving clues or stylishly addressing it.

Approach It as a Team

Finally, try your best to stay on the same team as your partner. It’s very important to try and be on the same page as your partner about this. Family is an issue that can easily divide couples if not addressed clearly and quickly. However, we believe you also realize that respect and kindness works both ways.

You are going to need to remember that this is about your relationship with your partner and that has to come first. Make sure you state clearly to your partner that this is about the two of you being strong and keeping your relationship healthy.

Asking what you can do to help improve the relationship with their family as well is also a bonus. You might not love all of your partner’s family, but you do need to respect and honor the relationship that existed before you came into your partner’s life.

IN CONCLUSION

Addressing issues like this with you partner and their family can be very sensitive and we need to accept that their might be issues from time to time. However, if it’s having a direct effect on you or the relationship, you need to say something. Be respectful, but be direct and straight to the point and the sooner you and your partner start to deal with the problem, the easier it will be. Ensure you both remain on the same team and you’ll find it can be easily solved. Love and light, Wonder.