How long should you wait after a relationship ends before dating again? Well, there is no perfect answer for you but I’ll say you should wait as long as it takes for you to heal. What do I mean by heal? Does anyone ever heal? We answer these questions and more in this article today.
Some of you may not even understand why we ask you to heal, when a relationship with someone you’re dating ends, you move on quick and that’s on period!!! (read that in Eni’s voice!). However, when a relationship ends regardless of who caused it and who didn’t cause it and even if you both agreed, there’s always an amount of grief shared. Time, love and work was dedicated into the relationship so it’s to be expected.
Grief is a constellation of emotions you experience when you lose someone with whom you had emotional attachments. The feelings you have when grieving are normal, but most of the time, they are unpleasant. People tend to want them to go away. What you need to realize though is that these feelings have a purpose. Sadness helps you to step away from others and to look inward. It gives you time to assess yourself and come to terms with your own failures and mistakes. It gives you time to think about the future you want and to slowly take steps forward.
There are other feelings when you grieve. Anger is a powerful emotion that helps you make changes, but it often becomes a source of bonding that can cause problems. Grieving people can join with one another in a relationship based on their anger at their ex-partners and quickly bond over that commonality. These relationships can grow fast and feel very powerful, but they need much more than shared anger as a basis.
First, you must accept the reality of the loss and begin to see the opportunities for a new future. Second, you need to feel the feelings of loss. This is the step most avoided but it’s necessary. Third, you must adjust to the realities of life without the other. The fourth step is letting go of the lost partner and finding new, meaningful relationships. These new relationships might be romantic or they might be something else.
IN CONCLUSION
To say exactly how long it will take you to heal is very hard to measure, maybe even impossible. To be honest, you may never feel completely healed. Don’t wait for that feeling of complete healing though or you may never move on. Once you have started accepting thoughts of a better future, then the journey is nearly done and you may be ready to try dating again. Love and light, Wonder.
