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Divorced But Living Whole: Four Nigerian Women Who are Thriving Despite Being Divorced

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Being divorced in America is not the same as being divorced in Nigeria and some parts of Africa. You have a lot convincing to do if you mistakenly get divorced or separated in Nigeria. Asides what the society thinks of you, you often also think the worst of yourself for daring to get a divorce. This feeling makes you lose your self esteem and your authentic eselsence of living. 

You are not the first to seek a divorce and you won’t be the last. Just like how failing once does not make you a failure, failing in one marriage doesn’t make you less marriage-worthy. Other women have gone through this process and come out whole and thriving. You may have a full lesson to glean from them. 

Damilola Adegbite

A Nigerian woman who got married to a Ghanaian actor, Chris Attoh; Their union ended in 2017 for not very clear reasons but her husband gave us an incline into what may have gone wrong. We wrote an article on this which we titled Chris Attoh and the Entitlement Mentality of African Men. 

Asides continuing to make a mark in her career as an actor, she recently launched a clothing line that has the media drooling over. 

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The earlier we get it into our minds that despite marriage, you can thrive the better. 

Toyin Abraham 

She was just a lowly actress known mostly for Yoruba movies when she got married to Adeniyi Johnson. The marriage was good from the outside but it didn’t take long before they went their separate ways. 

This article is not about who was wrong or right but about the need to understand that failing in marriage does not mean failing in life. Your purpose in life is not to get married, it is just part of the things you can choose to do or not do. 

After going through separation and ongoing divorce process, and after a bad media campaign against her for her involvement with Seun Egbegbe (an alleged iPhone and Dollar thief). Toyin Abraham has become the most influential Yoruba actress, a crossover actor who now frequent English movies, a box office queen with movies that has consistently sold out at the cinemas and the highest paid Nollywood actress. 

Sometimes, divorce and pain is what you need to go through in order to find yourself and your greatness. 

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Funke Akindele Got Divorced

After producing and starring in one of Nigeria’s most popular comedy movie, ‘Jenifa’ she succumbed to pressure and got married but in a matter of months, she got separated and divorced. 

This talented actress and producer has gone on to create one of the longest standing television drama, ‘Jenifa’s diary’ and built Sceneone TV app where thousands of people are subscribed to her entertainment content. 

Today, she is newly married and with twins. By the way, she is still highly sought after in the movie and entertainment industry. 

Tiwa Savage

When she was getting married to TeeBillz, her manager, everyone was excited for them but it didn’t take long before we realised there was fire on the mountain. There were accusations and counter-accussations until it appeared that the marriage is irreparable. 

After this bitter separation, Tiwa Savage has gone on to make multiple hit songs, win international awards and living life on her own terms. 

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Don’t get it wrong

I am not promoting divorce and it is certainly not my joy to see many divorced marriages.

However, it brings sadness to my heart when we see people become a shadow of themselves simply because they got divorced. It hurt deeply when I see the world judging and castigating the divorced. My heart bleeds when divorced people put their life on hold as well. 

Getting divorced may never be part of the plan but being miserable after divorce should never be an option. You may want to read on the Myths of divorce that is holding African women down.

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